Sunday, September 7, 2008

"Who's the Muslim?"


A Television Commercial  (with apologies to Apple)

 

Governor Sarah Palin and an AK-47-toting, fierce-looking Taliban leader stand side-by-side in white limbo. Light, humorous piano music is heard in the background.

 

Gov. Sarah Palin:(cheerfully, to camera) 

Hello, I'm Governor Sarah Palin.  I’m running for Vice-President.

 

The Taliban:(sternly, to camera)

And I'm the Taliban. You know, Governor... you and I really aren’t all that different…

 

Gov. Sarah Palin:

Are you kidding me, Taliban???  I'm going to lead the greatest country in the world, the land of the free, home of the brave.  You... You're just EVIL!


The Taliban:

C’mon Governor... I’m not really evil.  The people of my country are free too… just as long as they strictly follow my religious views.


Gov. Sarah Palin:  

Well, your right-on there... We’re one nation under God. We need to get our country back to good Christian values.


The Taliban:

I really like automatic weapons.  I like to shoot anything and anybody that gets in my way.


Gov. Sarah Palin:  

Me too.  I think everybody should have assault weapons. (Pointing to Taliban’s weapon) Say, is that a Tabuk or a Type 58A?  Think I could take out a moose with one of those?

 

The Taliban:

I am in Jihad, a holy war against western civilization.


Gov. Sarah Palin:  

And our troops are “out on a task that is from God”. It’s a plan “that is God's will."


The Taliban:

I destroy any art or literature that is against my religious views.


Gov. Sarah Palin: (proud)

When I was Mayor of Wasilla, I did fire a librarian cuz she wouldn’t remove books I didn't like from our library.  And the news media?  Don’t get me started.  Can you imagine… those liberal elites actually want me to answer questions before I… er, I mean John McCain… take control of our country.


The Taliban:

I don’t need a news media. My schools give our children a strict Islamic education.  I do not permit art or science to pollute our children’s minds.


Gov. Sarah Palin:

We don’t teach evolution in our schools.  The Bible says that God created the earth and everything on it in under a week. That’s good enough for me!


The Taliban:

I have some very tough rules for women in our society...


Gov. Sarah Palin:

Women have to follow my rules about what they can do with their bodies. And so do gays.


The Taliban: (confused, to Palin)  

What are gays?  (to camera): I prohibit any discussion of sex.


Gov. Sarah Palin: (smiling, confident)

I don’t want sex education in my state's schools.  I prefer "abstinence education".


The Taliban: (interested, turns to Gov. Palin)

How's that working out for you?


(Sound Effect: Baby crying, off camera.  Alarmed, Governor Palin turns to check on off-camera baby)


Cut to: FULL SCREEN LOGO:

McCain/Palin ‘08

And you thought Barack Obama was a Muslim

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Hypocrisy Alert!!!


For the last several months Senator McCain and his supporters have made much of Barack Obama's thin Washington resume. They forcefully argued that electing such an inexperienced candidate would put the United States of America in mortal danger. "Obama: A Dangerous President".

That argument was rendered null and void with yesterday's nomination of Alaska Governor Sarah Palin for Vice-President of the United States. Any person who supported the idea that Barack Obama's inexperience was dangerous, and also supports the nomination of Governor Palin must answer the following question:

How can any Republican who has spent the last 18 months relentlessly slamming Barack Obama for having no experience suddenly turn on a dime and become enthused over a VP pick with even LESS experience?

ESPECIALLY when this VP nominee has a much higher likelihood than most of actually having to serve as President of the United States.

ESPECIALLY when our country faces an "existential threat" from radical Islamic terrorism.

ESPECIALLY when Russia is acting like it wants to start a new cold war.

ESPECIALLY when Iran is threatening the world with development of nuclear weapons.

Ask this question of your McCain-supporting friends. Ask it again and again. Don't hope for an answer, because there is no answer.

Indeed, Americans are going feel extra safe knowing that the mayor of Wasilla, a graduate of the University of Idaho will be in charge of our foreign policy, the person with whom the buck stops when it comes to keeping America safe.

*********************

Shame on Senator John McCain! For all of his sputtering about how he puts his country first, with this choice, this judgment, he gives cynical politics priority over the welfare of his beloved country. He chose this person as his VP nominee, not because she was the most qualified Republican in the land... He chose her as a last, best hope for getting himself elected. He chose her because he thinks she can attract disgruntled Hillary Clinton supporters, and because appointing a radical conservative will boost his lackluster support among the conservative Republican base. Those are the ONLY reasons he choose Governor Palin. Her choice cannot be justified with any other reasoning.

The sad truth of the matter is, this strategy will probably accomplish those things. But it will not get him elected. He will boost support from his base, and he will bring in some hardcore Hillary supporters. But the rest of the country, those independent voters, those undecided voters sitting on the fence... A much larger group... will recognize this move for exactly what it is: A transparent, desperate political pandering exercise. This is beneath John McCain. Shame on him!

This is the judgment of the John McCain who accused Barack Obama of putting his political interests in front of the welfare of the country. That is what John McCain has done with this decision.

This is the judgment of the John McCain who said that it would be dangerous to elect a President who has little Washington experience. That is what John McCain has done with this decision.

With yesterday's announcement, McCain’s campaign achieved enormous success in diverting national discussion away from Obama’s bold acceptance speech and his enormously successful convention . Congratulations, Senator. Enjoy the moment. It will be short-lived. This politically driven nomination will provoke enormous scrutiny and endless well-deserved righteous criticism from Democrats and independents right up until election day.

Let's remember August 29, 2008 as the day that John McCain announced to the world that his own political future is more important than the future of the United States of America.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Safe, Clean Nuclear Power


A key portion of Senator McCain's Energy plan revolves around what he calls "safe, clean nuclear power." Just how safe is nuclear power?

Pretty safe.  It's been quite a while since the world has experienced a serious nuclear accident. We're doing OK.  No worries.

So why do liberals block efforts to revive nuclear power? Do we like fossil fuels better? No. Do we hate cheap electricity? Hardly. Remember, liberals don't have much money... we like to save a buck. Do we hate America? No, we like it just fine.  

So what's bothering us about nuclear power? We all agree that nuclear power has been pretty safe for the last 40-50 years. What's the big deal?

The problem is, when we're talking about nuclear power, "pretty safe" isn't good enough.  Not by a long shot.  

Below is a list of problems*, both real and potential, involved with nuclear power generation... a list that ought to scare the bejesus out of you, whether you're in the Jack Kemp fan club or a card carrying member of Move-on.org.

1. Nuclear Waste: The entire nuclear fuel chain, from mining to milling, processing, enrichment, and fuel irradiation in reactors generates radioactive waste. This includes 20-30 tons of high-level radioactive waster per year per reactor.  Some of the most intensely radioactive waste has short half-lives, up to a few weeks.  Other types of waste remains deadly for tens of thousands of years.  And that is the big problem.  How do we securely store vast amounts of a substance that can  leak into the water table and/or the atmosphere and kill millions of people until the year 10,207? And what fail-safe method exists for transporting the stuff near our cities and across our countryside to distant waste dumps? Nobody, repeat, nobody has an answer to this question.

2. Theft by terrorists of nuclear materials usable in even a "dirty bomb" would substantially increase if nuclear power is expanded.  This could result in a level of destruction hitherto unimagined.  Reactors themselves are terrorist targets and current ones are not even defended to the level of the 9/11 assault.  19 men in four temas, including air attach scenarios.  Thirty-two US reactors have fuel pools on the upper levels of the reactor building, shielded only by sheet metal... an open invitation to air attack.

3. Accidents: You're right, we haven't had a serious one in quite a while.  But that is no guarantee that we won't have one next week. New reactors, like old ones are most vulnerable to accidents. Existing evacuation plans in major population centers have been found to be unrealistic. The Price-Anderson Act ensures that the liability of an accident to a utility is capped at $10.8 billion.  A serious reactor accident could cost as much as $600 billion, the balance of which would likely be paid by taxpayers (the ones that are still alive).  Goodbye, tax cut!

4. Routine radiation releases: All reactors release radiation into the air, water and soil and cannot be described as "emissions-free".  Even in small quantities, these releases increase the incidence of cancer, especially in children.

Safe, clean nuclear power.  It sounds so good.  But it's neither clean nor safe.  If Senator McCain honestly faced facts, he would call it "frighteningly dangerous, potentially devastating nuclear power".   


*List courtesy beyondnuclear.org


Sunday, August 3, 2008

He's Not One of Us


That's the constant refrain we now here from McCain supporters about Obama.  "He's not one us" He's outside the mainstream.  He's elite.



And John McCain is just like rest of us:

He's married to a multi-millionaire trophy wife.
He has 7 houses all over the country.
He wears $500 shoes on the golf course
He flies around the country on his wife's jet.
He pays off a $750,000 credit card bill in full, monthly.

That John McCain is just like us. We should definitely vote for him.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

We'll Always Have Paris



Senator McCain said this week that he is proud of the ads his campaign's been running, comparing Barack Obama to Brittany Spears and Paris Hilton. That got me thinking...

Would Paris Hilton have made a better president than George W. Bush? Probably not, but she couldn't be too much worse. When you look closely, the two have more in common than you might think. Both rose to their positions in society on the achievements of their parents. W's career history is littered with failures (the baseball team, the oil business, his presidency to name a few). Just watch a few episodes of "The Simple Life" for a glimpse at Paris' abilities in the workplace. Both have shown an uncanny ability to achieve great popularity by achieving nothing. And neither have shown a great proclivity for the English language. So, it's a toss-up. If Paris had been president for the last 7 years, the country would be in more or less the same shape it's in now.

If McCain wins the presidency, he's going to owe Paris and Brittany more than just a debt of gratitude. They're going to deserve very high positions in the McCain administration. For Ms. Hilton, I would suggest a cabinet level position... Secretary of Hot. As for Ms. Spears, nothing less than Undersecretary of Underwear.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Making Flippy-Floppy

Much was made recently of Obama's shifts in position on public financing for his campaign FISA legislation.   He's a flip-flopper. Did you know that John McCain has had a few flip-flops of his own? Sixty-six of them, since he began his run for the presidency.  Not bad.

The (Oil) Blame Game


McCain's campaign ran an ad this week blaming Barack Obama for the current high gasoline prices. That's right, Senator Obama single-handedly caused 4-buck-a-gallon gas.

The gasoline gallon has risen $2.50 since oilmen George W. Bush and Dick Cheney took office in 2001. Exxon Mobil this week posted the largest quarterly profit of any company in history. $11.68 billion. That's around $90,000 per minute. In profit.

Yet it's all Barack Obama's fault. Right. Thanks for clearing that up for us, Senator McCain.

The (Middle) Name Game


Many Republicans amuse themselves and each other with Barack Obama's middle name. They can't resist tossing it like a hand grenade into their political emails, editorials, letters to the editor. Barack HUSSEIN Obama.  HUSSEIN, always in all caps, so we won't miss it.  It really is his middle name, so let's remind everybody about it whenever we can. All in CAPS of course. He's a Muslim, you know. Related to Sadaam. He's not one of us. He's secretly a terrorist.

In other parts of the world, Hussein is an extremely common name. Like Smith.  Or John.

Hmmm. John.  John Hinkley.  John Wilkes Boothe. One, a would-be presidential assassin. The other, an actual one. Both named John. Using the logic of the HUSSEIN-ophobes, we must assume that JOHN McCain has assassination in his blood. A Manchurian Candidate, programmed like previous Johns to assassinate the president... even if his target ends up being himself.  JOHN McCain. Be worried. He's going to kill the president.